kind of humor I like

Sikamikanico

Sikamikanico

2
The kind of humor I like is the thing that makes me laugh for five seconds and think for ten minutes.

Now here it goes...

A man won a ticket to the Super Bowl, but when he got there, he was very disappointed. He was on the far left, at the back. He was closer to the Goodyear Blimp than he was to the field, but halfway through the first quarter he spotted the best seat in the house.

He went over to the empty seat and said to the guy sitting beside it, "Is anyone sitting here?" "No.", the guy replied. So the man sat down, and about 30 minutes later, he couldn't resist saying, "Man! This is an awesome seat!

Whoever gave it up must be CRAZY!" The guy sitting next to him replied, "Well, actually, that was supposed to be my wife's seat, but she died." The man, feeling like **** said, "Oh, that's awful, but couldn't you have asked a relative to come with you?"

"No", said the guy. The man was confused, and asked, "Why not?" The guy replied, "Because they're all at the funeral."
 
Sikamikanico

Sikamikanico

2
Let's try it again...

A man was taking his wife, who was pregnant with twins, to the hospital when his car went out of control and crashed. Upon regaining consciousness, he saw his brother, a relentless world-class practical joker, sitting at his bed side.

He asked his brother how his wife was and his brother replied, "Don't worry, everybody is fine and you have a son and a daughter. But the hospital was in a real hurry to get the birth certificates filed and since both you and your wife were unconscious, I named them for you."

The husband was thinking to himself, "Oh no, what has he done now?" and said with trepidation, "Well what did you name them?"
The brother replied, "I named the little girl Denise."
The husband, relieved, said, "That's a very pretty name! What did you come up with for my son?"

The brother replied, "Denephew."
 
kelp0027

kelp0027

EOG Dedicated
now;

the second joke was funny;

after the ten min it took me to figger it out..!!

lol

gl

:cocktail
 
Sikamikanico

Sikamikanico

2
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, both women barely large enough to see over the dashboard. As they cruised along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light.

After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection, the light was red, and again they went right through. This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through it.

She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us!"

Mildred turned to her and cried, "Holy Crap! Am I driving?"
 
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