I can't sleep.
I keep thinking about Notre Dame and UCLA on Saturday. I didn't have ND but I can tell that UCLA has personally saved me the inconvenience of having to run around cashing a lot of tickets.
I keep pacing, and I keep thinking to myself, "What did I do wrong?"
But then, as I drive around early Saturday morning, I find that on almost every Las Vegas AM radio channel there is someone trying to help me. Someone who has my best interests in mind. Someone who tells me why I lose -- I am trying to pick the games myself.
These people (I believe they are referred to as touts), are so different from me. They tell me that if I will just dial their toll-free number, they can save me from myself. For them, every weekend is a "great weekend." For they live in ToutWorld, a utopian universe where nobody ever loses, and nobody ever breaks even. It's a world where everyone went 9-1 last week and this week looks even better.
These people are a godsend. So give them a call if you're not 16-4 over your last 20.
LOL. This modern-day Theatre of the Absurd is so off the charts. I used to think the radio guys selling the magic vitamin "supplements" were scammers. You know the ones. They totally discount modern medicine and tell you if you'll just order a bottle of their magic colon-cleansing elixir, all your health problems will disappear. Those vitamin shysters are benign compared to these tout guys.
I guess my award for best reason to call a tout was offered by one Soprano-sounding radio "expert" who started with the usual boilerplate "I have important information on a game that will cover the nuimber by at least three touchdowns!!?"
I turn the radio up!!!
But damn, he can't tell us the play over the radio. It happens to be a "syndicate" play, and he promised the "syndicate," for "security" reasons that he would not "release" the play over the air. Oh yeah, "security" reasons. Now I understand.
Hope and greed are two very powerful human emotions. These guys make a great living providing both to gamblers.
I keep thinking about Notre Dame and UCLA on Saturday. I didn't have ND but I can tell that UCLA has personally saved me the inconvenience of having to run around cashing a lot of tickets.
I keep pacing, and I keep thinking to myself, "What did I do wrong?"
But then, as I drive around early Saturday morning, I find that on almost every Las Vegas AM radio channel there is someone trying to help me. Someone who has my best interests in mind. Someone who tells me why I lose -- I am trying to pick the games myself.
These people (I believe they are referred to as touts), are so different from me. They tell me that if I will just dial their toll-free number, they can save me from myself. For them, every weekend is a "great weekend." For they live in ToutWorld, a utopian universe where nobody ever loses, and nobody ever breaks even. It's a world where everyone went 9-1 last week and this week looks even better.
These people are a godsend. So give them a call if you're not 16-4 over your last 20.
LOL. This modern-day Theatre of the Absurd is so off the charts. I used to think the radio guys selling the magic vitamin "supplements" were scammers. You know the ones. They totally discount modern medicine and tell you if you'll just order a bottle of their magic colon-cleansing elixir, all your health problems will disappear. Those vitamin shysters are benign compared to these tout guys.
I guess my award for best reason to call a tout was offered by one Soprano-sounding radio "expert" who started with the usual boilerplate "I have important information on a game that will cover the nuimber by at least three touchdowns!!?"
I turn the radio up!!!
But damn, he can't tell us the play over the radio. It happens to be a "syndicate" play, and he promised the "syndicate," for "security" reasons that he would not "release" the play over the air. Oh yeah, "security" reasons. Now I understand.
Hope and greed are two very powerful human emotions. These guys make a great living providing both to gamblers.
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